With deep joy and a good, strong dose of anticipation, I’m excited to share that we are adopting another little boy from Korea! I’ve contemplated many times over how I might use this space to share about God’s kindness in giving us this opportunity again. If you’ve ever read much of my writings, you know my desire to assure my reader has gained a glimpse into the heart of our family’s journey. Yet, I’ve wrestled with how I might resurrect a space that has been quiet for a couple of years. The dynamics of our time and our family look a bit different than it did during the years that led to Lyle’s homecoming. Any spare time I find these days goes to attempting to keep my little shop alive and let’s be honest – sleeping! And strangely, I’ve dealt with guilt that satan has attempted to place in my thoughts. A struggle with the idea that so many came around us in our wait for Lyle and then I just disappeared from our very real support in social media for quite some time. Writing this makes the ridiculousness of it apparent. Yet, the confession of it seemed worthy as we attempted to share of our newest little guy. I also have longed to express a bit of my heart and God’s movement within our home in the last couple of years.
The reality that growing your family through adoption is oftentimes a community effort aids in my yearning to be transparent. Grant and I have processed for the last several months about how we might move forward in growing our family. We had many different conversations about all the avenues that God could use and He again gently made it clear that we should walk towards Korea. We cannot deny how He has tied our hearts to Lyle’s birthplace and we are humbled by the opportunity to be able to provide him with a brother with whom he can share his heritage. We made just a couple of steps forward by way of email to our program director and the next thing we knew, we were having a phone call the week of Easter about a precious little boy. So here we are, filling out piles upon piles of paperwork to get this clock ticking to bring this little guy HOME! We will have a plethora of fundraisers to make this happen and are excited to share these efforts with you. I have oftentimes said that fundraising is an insanely vulnerable place to be. Yet, one thing Grant and I have learned through our marriage and the growth of our family, God undoubtedly uses community! We are eager to see how He might provide and though we have a strong desire to do our part we also hope to have a deep faith that in the end, God will do what He pleases in how He provides.
We are fast approaching our Lyle-man being home 2 years! I just shared with Grant last week that one of the things I’m currently grateful for is the fact that I do not question Lyle’s love for us both. He deeply and unashamedly loves his momma and daddy. And my goodness, those feelings are reciprocated to the fullest extent. The 2-year journey to build into this love has been hard, joyous, incredibly stretching and completely fruitless without God’s abounding grace for us all. This second year especially, I can see God’s kindness in deepening this love so that Lyle may safely open up in his own way about the loss he processes. This openness doesn’t always present itself with words but is undoubtedly tied to all the changes he has been through in his life. I continue to wrestle with a very strong urge to protect my son while still having an openness and awareness of adoption that is genuine. However, I also desire for the weight of the label of being adopted to be lifted from my little guys. Hoping that each time I talk about them, the dynamics of our family or even their own personal healing and growth, that one’s thoughts aren’t always tied to them being adopted. And may that hope never diminish the very good, God-given gift that it is. It’s a reminder to continually be prayerful for a balance of not living in ignorance about the make-up of our family and our son’s stories, but also giving them freedom to just be two little brothers with parents who adore them! If anything, I never want it to be said that they are so lucky to have us or that we are giving them some gift they never could have been given otherwise. We are merely a family grown by the incredible gift of adoption through a loving, Sovereign God!
We are so excited to be standing at the beginning of this journey to our second son. I’m anxious to see how the Lord will grow and stretch us during the wait that is ahead. I know that Lyle will keep us busy and pre-occupied in a good way but the more I look at our newest little one’s pictures, my heart is growing in love and eagerness to get him in our arms! In the meantime, our first priority is to get things organized for a week of fundraisers in honor of his 1st birthday next Saturday!!
So, we would love to you to stay tuned and hang around a bit….
Or if you just can’t wait until then and see that little donate button ;), please know we are genuinely so grateful and humbled by anything that is given towards helping us bring this little guy home.